“The more we idealized the past, however, and refuse to acknowledge our childhood sufferings, the more we pass them on unconsciously to the next generation.” *
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The child in man’s life is enormously manifest
in the present and determines much of behaviour, especially the unconscious
behaviour. And in big decisions, in extreme difficulties and at important
moments, the child determines in man more than the reasonable person realizes.
And this child in man is, as Alice Miller has described,
in fact always violated, treated unfairly, disappointed in the adults or
infected by a parent.
And this mistreated child determines in fact
the decisions of man, so to speak more than man realizes. For example, some
adults never acquire a partner, or end up in a life of addictions or
depression, precisely by this hidden
suffering child in them. And only if man accepts and feels compassion for this
suffering child, one can go on. And what most people do is draw a veil over
their childhood. And thus continue to carry a greater burden lifelong , with
more influence on their lives than necessary.
And God does not argue to send everybody in therapy.
A good therapy may lead man to his own abused child. But a nice encounter, a
clear dream, a open-minded person, an insight, intense prayers or a deep
relationship with God may be supportive as well. Man may start to love that little hidden child in the inner self.
And many things can be solved then and healed.
Alice Miller may be blessed.
My blessings to you all
*Alice Miller, For Your Own Good: Hidden Cruelty in Child-Rearing and the Roots of Violence
Nr. 390
