Loving oneself

I have observed man is treating oneself rather harshly. Almost unlovingly. Why is it so difficult for man to love oneself? And to reconcile oneself with own imperfection?

Because man loves children more than adults. Man loves young and naive and helpless and vulnerable, so to speak children and young animals. This is calling up parental feelings within. But the attitude to adults is the opposite. And I exagerate for the sake of clarity. Adults are on their one, do not need anybody, have to be able to everything. And then love is replaced by demands and duties and responsibilities and obligations. And especially not too much understanding and empathy, rather judgment and rejection. But the attitude to others implies some decency, civilization, social rules and polite willingness. So then the demanding attitude is softened and is becoming more one of understanding and loving.
But the attitude to oneselves deep down inside! A big attitude of demands, wishes, duties, laws, rules, obligations and how it should be.

That is on the long run unbearable. So in difficult moments then one is inclined to consolation, and not always in a healthy way, addictions are an example. And then one becomes more unlovingly and more condemning one selves because addictions are not fine.
How to get out of this vicious circle?

Very simple: adopt yourself, accept the child in you, be prepared to accept everything inside without judgment. Say yes to all feelings and thoughts and instincts and inclinations and desires and cravings. And saying yes doesn’t imply to be a slave and express them all. There is a difference between what you think and feel on one hand and what you do on the other hand.
Saying yes to your inner self is saying yes to everything inside, implies lovingly accepting you are human, imperfect, being who you are,  all is well, so to speak everything may be seen, everything may be felt, and may be thought. Without judgment.

Then light is falling on the inner self. Then it is possible to give love to yourself, anyway. As a mother is cherishing her child, anyway.
And changes and improvements and refining and unlearning and learning and becoming a better person are ingredients of chapter two.
Chapter one is considering yourself lovingly, accepting yourself lovingly, acknowledging you may be who you are. And knowing no one has the right to judge you and condemn you. Nobody. Because even God does not. And God wants you not to do it either. Not condemning the other, and not yourself.

My blessings to you all